Entry 90: "FusionFallout"

Yo!

Thought I'd try to squeeze one more blog post in while there's still technically some 2008 left! We're almost through holiday time right now... Still trying to brush the taste of egg nog out of our mouths, and getting ready for National Hangover Day-- I mean, New Year's Day, anticipating which resolutions we're gonna break first.... Time to end the year with one last blog.

So those of you who own an Xbox 360... Most, if not all of you have made your Avatars by now.

In case you don't know, the Avatars are 3D caricatures people make to serve as a digital representation of themselves to literally see themselves in certain Avatar-enabled X360 games (Uno, I think, is the most popular one right now).

The problem is the same one people were saying would happen before the Avatars came out last month: It's a little tacked-on and unnecessary. Sure, some of the other features of the Xbox 360 Fall Firmware Update are truly awesome, the best one arguably being the new Xbox Party Chat system which lets you have up to 8-person conference calls over Xbox Live. Way better than using multiple 1-on-1 private chat channels to use voice communication with people in games, movies and whatever else they have going on at the time. But the Avatars (and I love joking with people about this) let Microsoft switch out people's Xbox 360s for Xbox 36Wiis. They look like taller, more detailed Miis.

Case in point: Here's what I look like as an Avatar:

I'm a tad thinner than this in real life, which you can see for yourself in my "The Rant" YouTube talk show, but configuring it to be any thinner makes me look like turning sideways makes me invisible. I personally prefer the Simpsonizer version better anyway:


At the time, there wasn't a way to put sunglasses on it without making me look very stupid, and I'm too lazy to edit the pic right now, so there.

Moving on...........

In 1999, Turner Broadcasting helped create an online trading card game called Cartoon Orbit. It was moderately successful for several years, until it was abruptly canned in 2006, some believe to help free up bandwidth for their still-young streaming video sister sites, Toonami Jetstream, [adult swim] Fix and Cartoon Network Video. It turns out, there was a contingency plan all along to fill the void created by Orbit's absence. It took two years, but CartoonNetwork.com finally set it all up.

This weekend started the second beta period of "FusionFall", the first Massively-Multiplayer Online Game, or MMOG, designed almost specifically for those too young (or broke) to get into World of Warcraft.

No Lich King though.

FusionFall's main plotline involves a literal, physical representation of a "Cartoon Network World", being invaded by green creatures called Fusion Monsters from a weird sort of parallel world run by some villainous alien called Fuse, who's so hell-bent on literally taking over Cartoon Network, he's made evil, green-skinned, crimson-eyed doppelganger versions of random CN characters to carry out the corruption of the world. This means big, bad, green, evil versions of even the tamest of characters (even Eduardo from Foster's Home for Imaginary Friends, who I believe is the fourth main Fusion Monster you encounter), running around creating chaos and so it's apparently up to you to fix everything, while running errands for random cartoon characters like find a robotic head in a junkyard, kill eight monsters, or visit the Foster's house to do Mr. Harriman's dry cleaning or something.

So you're beating all the monsters in this big virtual universe, complete with varying Cartoon Network-related versions of things and places that would be in the real world, but overexaggerated and cartoon-ized. For example, you may see not just any supermarket, but a Malph's store from The Powerpuff Girls. Or, you'll notice not just any towering, rusted fifty-foot pile of scrap metal in the junkyard, but Megas XLR. Little aesthetic design touches mostly, to make the avid Cartoon Network viewer feel right at home. It was designed overall very well, with many main quests, side quests, special appearances from Time Warner properties-- I mean, famous cartoon characters, standard stuff. You can also collect these MiniMe-style cartoons called Nanos that have special abilities you can use to enhance your character, or party's strength, health or collective abilities and such. Oh yeah, you can play with small groups of fellow gamers at a time, complete with buddy lists, a relatively user-friendly inventory management system, and an email system that, to send anything, actually costs your character some in-game money, called Taros, under the guise of postage costs.

Even e-mail isn't safe from Uncle Sam's taxes and charges these days, it seems.

Some big flaws are made quite abundant though, like the inclusion of 3D, lifelike versions of characters that have NO business being three-dimensional in the first place, and are done so badly they'd give the 15-year-olds the game was mainly meant for nightmares. Case-in-point: At some point you run into Eddy from Ed, Edd n Eddy:

I'd display a photo of what the FusionFall version of this guy looks like, but your monitor would shatter from the hideousness of that half-inebriated mugshot of a face. It's like the occasional SpongeBob episode where live-action mouths or hands are edited on top of the characters for a one-shot joke/gag, but they're so uncharacteristically out of place and weird looking in the context of a cartoon you can't help but cringe and laugh at the same time. Picture that, but with the ENTIRE character. As you can imagine, this makes it difficult to take FusionFall seriously as an MMO, but at least it's free to play. And of course, being the younger, hipper cousin of Cartoon Orbit, there's loads of interesting items, apparel, trading and marketing abound.

Bottom Line: FusionFall seems like an okay online adventuring, collecting and pest control game. I gave it a shot over the weekend, and I'm actually considering sticking around with it passively during those EXTREMELY rare instances when I have absolutely nothing better to do, and I'm too lazy to goof around with RuneScape.

The website to visit is http://www.fusionfall.com; I'm not sure exactly how long this beta is going on for, but the final game will be released one way or another on January 14.

Hope you all had a great Christmas/Chanukah/Kwanzaa, and be sure to enjoy the first weekend of the final year in the 2000's. New blog posts return Monday, February 5.

See you on the other side.

-D.

Entry 89: "Solid as Barack"

Yo!

It's finally over.

The biggest, most complex and insane political campaign since the dawn of time (Oh, yes. I went there.) is finally over. The dust has mostly settled, and Barack Obama is officially going to be, effective January 21st, 2009 (I don't count Inauguration Day), the 44th President of the United States.

...........If Dr. King was alive today........

You know, there were a lot of reasons and a lot of people who helped pave the way for Barack's big win Tuesday night, but I believe we're overlooking one of, if not probably THE most important person of all: Obama's predecessor.

No, I'm not talking about George W. Bush.

I mean this man:


Dennis Haysbert, better known as David Palmer to those of us who watch 24.

See, this fictional character and the way he was portrayed in the span of time Haysbert was on 24 was pretty much the first time it became okay to have an African-American in the role of President of the United States. First season, Palmer was still just running for election, and away from an assassination plot (which got him anyway five seasons later. Sorta like on Heroes, as the big plotline from the whole first season was to keep Zachary Quinto from stealing Hayden Panettiere's big super-healing ability, only to have season three start a while back, and Quinto barges into the cheerleader's house and steals her ability anyway so you're left with an unfulfilling "that's it?!?!?!" moment, but I'm rambling). Second season starts up in Fall of 2002. Secret Service agents are addressing the newly-elected President, facing opposite the camera, concentrating on fishing with his son, informing him that there's a situation in Los Angeles. President turns around and reveals to the audience that Palmer not only survived everything, but got the votes, too!

I believe this creative decision to introduce the concept of a pigmentation-rich President into the mainstream media, slowly and interestingly, helped in no small part to warm up America and the world to this possibility becoming reality. We just needed EXACTLY the right brother to make it happen for real. Don't get me wrong, there were many other important factors and issues as well, not the least of which being George W. Bush's photograph being added to the dictionary under "disaster". My point is this simple real-time action drama in a way, as far as commercial culture was concerned, did offer a small bit of assistance in making this President's real-life existence not just plausible, but desirable. African-Americans can and should be given a fair shot at being the leader of the free world.

Having said that, Palin had a significant shot at getting McCain the win for the same reason as well. Except Geena Davis' ABC show from a few years back about the first female president, Commander in Chief, just didn't last long enough. Unlike 24, there just weren't enough ratings. Also not helping was Commander in Chief creator Rod Lurie's statement that the concept of Palin having to get on-the-job foreign relations experience would be "idiotic."

But enough about Sarah Palin.

Bottom Line: Haysbert preheated the oven. Obama put in the turkey. Which is a perfect metaphor come to think of it since Thanksgiving's right around the corner, but I digress. All I'm saying is that the media was more integral to victory now more than any other election. For more reasons than the overall debate coverage and such. Except McCain's smear ads. That media coverage didn't seem to work out for him.

........But that's just me.

........and about 52% of the popular vote.

Seriously though, congratulations to President-ELECT Barack Obama.

Oh, and on a completely unrelated note, the 24: Redemption movie comes to Fox on 11/23.

Later.
-D.

Entry 88: "License to Swill"

Yo!

What the crap happened with gas prices last week? I was driving by a Zooms recently and nearly had a heart attack, highly uncharacteristic of someone in their early twenties, upon seeing this price from the side of the road!


...Especially since only four months ago, this was how pricey things were:



I honestly was starting to think we'd never see a two in the dollar column again for a while there! Oh, but then earlier today I noticed a few stations selling unleaded for $2.69. It's almost as if someone/"THEY" want us to forget about the astronomical gas prices since we're so close to a major election!

Ah, what am I saying? That's crazy talk, right?

Moving on...........

So today was my 21st birthday.

Believe it or not, I did not get drunk today.

I've been getting a lot of comments thrown my way about how 21 is the birthday where you enter full-blown adulthood. While true to a certain extent, what does 21 really do? Think about it; 18 gives you...

- Voting.

- Smoking.

- Soldier.....ing <---It's a word!!--]

Obviously 18 beats 21 by a long shot when you compare them from a benefits standpoint. However, more people still give first place to 21 because as I said, it's more typically associated with maturity. Even though as we all know, maturity knows no particular age limits. Or better yet, how does one define IMmaturity? Some of my readers penalize me for citing Wikipedia references, so fine!

Merriam-Webster Online defines immaturity as:

"lacking complete growth, differentiation, or development."

Complete growth? So partial, or even a majority of your psychological and emotional growth's completion by 21, for example, since it's technically not 100% there by the time the candles are blown out, does that mean you're still by definition immature? Never mind the fact you survived long enough to see your 21st birthday, which unacceptably too many don't get to experience for themselves for one tragic reason or another. For that matter, how do you gauge the completion of your own personal development without the ability to see yourself far in the future so you can know where you should/will be, and see your own progress better.

Or, how about defining complete:

"having all necessary parts, elements, or steps"

Which, since all birthdays are incremental steps through life anyway, that definition helps nothing since you can't know how many steps you're meant to have without looking into your personal future somehow, which even if that were possible would bring up more questions about the nature of destiny and inevitability or the lack thereof depending on what your beliefs on that are (now and then/later). Plus that whole thing about the same matter can't exist in two places at the same time or it could tear the universe a new bellybutton or something apocalyptic like that, I forget the line.

Hey, was that from Back to the Future or Timecop?

....Yeah, probably both.

Anyway, I'm tired of this goose chase through the dictionary. Of course we're supposed to better ourselves as we grow up, but in what sense (which brings us right back to maturity)? Also, why can't we take care of adult matters while trying to enjoy ourselves in spite of it as much as we can? Life sucks. We all know this. But sacrificing your "youthful" mannerisms and wit that got you laughs in late high school, got you some chicks in college, and makes you the life of the party at... well, parties, doesn't make you any more of a mature adult at twenty-something than you were at 18. Or 19.

Congratulations, you're a square.

In fact, I believe the extreme is true: Making yourself more "traditionally" mature by common definition sooner, makes you way less mature than you would be if you started changing your ways later at 21. You've just rewritten the core of your character to conform to what others say they expect of you. They may have your best interests in mind, true. But where do you draw the line between keeping some "immaturity" and compromising your individuality? These days, you have to find a way to laugh at life, or how can you cope with the hard times? How can you cope with yourself? Most importantly, how do you not cross that line without that certain Delorean car which would help give you "Ghost of Christmases Yet To Come" moments to see what'll happen if you continue down whatever path in life you're on at that time.

You gotta stay on the right path--- sorry, steps somehow...

Bottom Line: Don't get me wrong, I'm not advocating that we all devolve into a society of Stiflers, just spewing vulgar sex jokes and forcing derogatory nicknames on people all the time because we can. That's a different kind of immaturity. All I'm saying is since when did making certain observances within the appropriate tasteful and environmental or verbal context constitute immaturity? Within reason, of course. Everyone knows you should always be careful what you say when, and about/with whom, etc.

Knowingly & willfully throwing away your sense of social decency & self-censorship, now THAT's immature.

...But that's just me.

Happy drinking! ...Just don't forget to forget your keys.

-D.

Entry 87: "She Blinded Me With Science Fiction"

Yo!

A small milestone was reached very recently.



This is the first video response I've ever gotten for one of my 'Rant' shows over on YouTube. Thanks "DreamingJonasOJD"; wish those types of replies & comments would happen more often or at least more promptly than three months after the post, but that's YouTube keywords for you, I suppose! Lately (especially over the summer), if you don't put the phrase "Joker Disappearing Pencil" SOMEWHERE in your video info as you post, the search engine doesn't pick you up and you won't get a lot of views very fast, for some strange reason.

By the way! No, I didn't forget about episode five though. Just started finally filming interviews again yesterday!

I'll make this quick. The Fox network has this crazy sci-fi show going on now called Fringe, and yesterday was its five-week-anniversary. I'm calling it crazy because it's simply textbook J.J. Abrams. Seemingly random characters (seasoned FBI agent/female lead character, cynical con man with checkered past, elderly quack scientist fresh out of the straitjacket) thrust into a mysterious situation (the Pattern!!! ...Because it sounds just ominous enough for network television), some of whom may know more about the situation than they let on originally (okay, a lot), and the explanations always seem like they were written by the Futurama staff in another Anthology of Interest, but in a bad way: Just cobble together an explanation with a bunch of big words and the average 18-35 would be too stupid to know they're BS-ing, and too lazy to do the fact-checking for themselves.

Okay stereotypically, maybe that last part's a little true.

.....BUT MY ENCYCLOPEDIA'S WAAAY UP ON THE TOP SHELF!

....AND THE BRITTANICA.COM BOOKMARK IS WAAAY AT THE BOTTOM OF THE LIST!

In any case, this isn't to say that crazy pseudo-science makes for a bad show; we've just seen this formula before. As I hinted at last paragraph, It's Lost plus X-Files. Nothing more.

Fox just recently ordered what's known as "the back nine", meaning nine more episodes for season one, bringing the total from 13 to 22. Good for them, but just a reminder-- Excuse me, Bottom Line: The pressure's on with this show. Need I remind Fox, the 18-35s may Want to Believe, but not enough to get past wanting to see Dark Knight for the tenth time ("Did you see that? He made the pencil DISAPPEAR!!"), and no, saying the second movie was five years too late is true but not enough of an excuse. We're still open to another "Mulder-Scully-Doggett-Reyes-Skinner-AnyOtherAgentsIForgot" dynamic in primetime, but it will not last very long into the sophomore year without more to offer than crazy blue lights on the side of your TV screen every time something Pattern-related happens. By the way, I heard a TV podcast recently discussing this (I think it was IGN's Channel Surfing) and I agree completely: This show was story-wise and formula-wise just rushed together too much, too soon.

Case in point: On last week's show, I didn't think that bald "Observer" guy regressing into a second-grader and mimicking Joshua Jackson should have been enough to get Jackson's character to stay on the team after the audience is reminded several times that episode alone how badly he wants out of it. J.J. Abrams and his team have been in this industry far too long to not know that you can't rush character development or their own convoluted plotlines that you need OnStar to navigate through.

...But that's just me.

Later.
-D.

Entry 86: "A Thin Line Between Love & Hadron"

Yo!

As all of you know by now, this week is the seventh anniversary of the September 11th, 2001 attacks. Now, a brief moment of silence in honor of the victims.



























.........................Thank you.

"It's the end of the world as we know it....."

-Michael Stipe

Sad, but true.

For those who don't know, or slept peacefully through it, yesterday early morning was almost the end of the world!!

Semi-seriously.

See, there's this ridiculously large, underground test chamber on the border between Switzerland & France called....

...The LARGE HADRON COLLIDER!!! (*cue dramatic reverb music)

...That was designed to perform a lot of crazy-complex tests to determine the origins of the universe or something like that... According to an Associated Press report, the Collider's experiments...

"could reveal more about 'dark matter,' antimatter and possibly hidden dimensions of space and time. It could also find evidence of the hypothetical particle — the Higgs boson — which is sometimes called the 'God particle' because it is believed to give mass to all other particles, and thus to matter that makes up the universe."

The first proton beams ran a "test lap" around the machine Wednesday morning; nothing too serious or groundbreaking initially... We just now know the thing works. And can expect the big tests to happen within the next six to eight weeks or so, when we'll be seeing a lot more of this happening:


Holy crap.

Why this is considered by some to be the "beginning of the end" is for a number of reasons. Some theorize the protons the collider was built to smash together, already traveling around inside it at the speed of light, could theoretically create a micro black hole (yes, the "no light can escape its gravitational vacuum force" kind) that COULD eventually grow & consume the entire planet.

...Also maybe galaxy....

Another reason is one of the collider's experiments could also HYPOTHETICALLY create what's known as a "Strangelet," or Strange Matter. Which, due to the substance's composition, upon its creation would (even a nanoscopically small piece of it) eventually come in contact with the floor of the collider and guess what? The collider itself would be entirely changed into Strange Matter. Then the underground caverns surrounding the collider would change. Then everything touching the ground all around the world. The runaway fusion reaction would just continue until every atom on, in and of Earth literally becomes "strange."

I couldn't discuss this latter scenario with anyone without getting laughs.

Geez, and with the big election heating up at less than sixty days away, I suppose we don't need the LHC to make American politics any stranger, right?

(*cue drums-and-cymbal rimshot)

Anyway, both scenarios are only extreme hypothetical outcomes that, like other horrifying outcomes, have been supposedly disproven several times over. Or so we're told.

Bottom Line: Realistically, even if the disproving scientists are right and the LHC's experiments-- nay, existence won't yield anything apocalyptic... Isn't the fact that many educated people are making reasonably sound arguments for what could go wrong with such a groundbreaking project reason enough not to do it? More than that, shouldn't we be using this 21st-century scientific brilliance to help fix humanity's problems as they are now, and not to play russian roulette with mankind's destiny in the name of understanding the universe? Besides, I'm pretty sure Michael Jackson sang something about "starting with the man in the mirror" and getting your own house in order before you go fixing and exploring others.... As any sci-fi fan will tell you in a heartbeat, the worst things imaginable have happened despite the best of intentions.

What if humanity isn't supposed to discover the God particle?

What if advancing mankind carries just too damn much cost?

...Pardon my français...

...But that's just me.

I can't go into this topic more without my brain imploding into a black hole, instantaneously reducing me and my house to a singularity, so go HERE for the official LHC website and HERE for Wikipedia's article for more information.

Later. I need a break.
-D.


P.S. By the way, just in case the world ends, Douglas Adams' dolphins say so long and thanks for all the fish.

Entry 85: "Why So Seriously?"

Yo!

Ladies & gentlemen...

Okay, probably mostly gentlemen, I guess...

...The Xbox 360 Achievements list for Gears of War 2 was released this past weekend!!!

Among the notable ones are:

"Friends with Benefits" - 50G
(Complete all acts in co-op as Marcus or Dom)

That right there is a winner in my book! Otherwise, it's back to the Gears 1 system of "No, it's MY turn to be Dom! I gotta get that achievement!" since before, it only worked if you were that character. By the way, not helping squash the running joke that started last summer about homosexual undertones in Gears' campaign between Marcus and Dominic, the two achievements that you get before this one are actually called "One Night Stand" (10G) and "Open Relationship" (30G). 'Nuff said.

"Photojournalist" - 10G
(Submit a spectator photo)

Yeah, way to steal that from Battlefield: Bad Company! What, we don't get an achievement for submitting video? Wait. Has it been confirmed whether or not we even get video?? How will the photo system work? Is theater mode user-friendly, assuming we get one? ...I need a hug.

"Kick 'em When They're Down" - 10G
(Perform all 11 unique executions on a downed enemy)

Okay, so you have basic melee punch, curb stomp, all seven returning weapons from Gears 1, the big shield-thing... Ah! Grenades? That's the eleventh execution, right?? Or does the Flamethrower get one too? Where's that fan-forum weblink....?

"Hoard the Horde" - 30G
(Survive all 50 waves of Horde; any difficulty, any map)

I can see the casual-difficulty sessions happening now... People running around with snipers against all those Locust A.I. bots, gloating like Oprah Winfrey in fall sweeps: "YOU get a headshot! YOU get a headshot! YOU get a headshot!!!"

"Crossed Swords" - 10G
(Win 10 chainsaw duels; any mode)

This is the EXACT reason Microsoft doesn't want third-party game peripheral makers to sell X360 controllers with turbo-repeat buttons. They'd break the system, man! ...Even though there are still way too few of these achievements that require super-fast button mashing to get, they'd still pose a threat to the fairness of Xbox Live, I suppose.

"Back to Basic" - 10G
(Successfully complete the five lessons of multiplayer Training Grounds)

....Um.... People know how to play this game by now. You'd kinda be hard-pressed to find someone who owns an Xbox 360 and hasn't at least rented Gears 1 since it came out in late-2006. This kind of achievement was important in say, Shadowrun, which these days you can't PAY people to play that game on PC as well as 360 like it was intended to by the way, but for purposes of getting players accustomed to multiplayer since that's all the game was and there's no campaign mode to teach them how to play in that game. Multiplayer training in Gears 2... From what I've seen, it's way too much like Gears 1 in terms of actual play dynamic, so the NEW training would be basically what, teaching you how to crawl away slowly from someone about to decapitate you with a crossbow? Real smart, Cliffy. Just saying.

"Smells Like Victory" - 10G
(Kill 30 enemies with the Scorcher Flamethrower, any mode)

Okay, I remember when rumors were flying around last year that there was gonna be a flamethrower weapon you could buy as an optional add-on from Xbox Marketplace eventually. Guess Epic dragged their feet on it for so long they figured they'd throw it into the sequel. Fair enough. Now, about those rumors of a playable female soldier character... When can we expect Gears 3?

"Takes a Licking" - 30G
(Melee 30 Tickers, any mode)

WHAT THE CRAP IS A TICKER?? Ah, forget this one. Next achievement!

"Once More, With Feeling" - 10G
(Perform 30 perfect active reloads, any mode)

I know, I know... All you 'active-whores' in Live Multiplayer are rejoicing about being able to get this achievement again, right?

"Completionist" - 30G
(Recover all 41 collectibles, any difficulty)

ALL RIGHT! More COG Tags to collect!!

"Suicide Missionary" - 150G
(Complete all campaignacts on Insane difficulty)

Whoa, mama. So this, plus the other three stackable achievements you get automatically from the other difficulty modes (25, 50 & 75G for Casual, Norman & Hardcore respectively), plus the 10G you get for the last chapter of the last act in the game, means trudging all the way through Insane difficulty in the end means you get 310 Gamerscore in one shot! ...Oh, wait. 340. Can't forget about those collectibles, now can we?

Now, here's my favorite one:

"Seriously 2.0" - 50G
(Kill 100,000 enemies, any mode)

HALLELUJAH! HALLELUJAH! Scream it out from the highest mountains! Tell your children! Tell your neighbors! Tell your neighbors' children! Tell your postmaster! The 'Seriously' achievement no longer requires using the TrueLuck-- sorry, TrueSkill RANKED matchmaking system! The achievement description said ANY MODE! Sure, the flipside is 10,000 would be too easy for people to help each other get too quickly, so they tack on an extra digit to the end of that number to counterbalance the removal of Gears 1's ranked restriction, but I don't care! Seriously soesn't require the TrueSkill system anymore!!!

It technically hasn't for a while though, come to think of it. The Windows Vista PC version of Gears 1 has an achievement called "Not So Seriously..." that you get for 10,000 kills in regular unranked player matches. What, the Xbox 360 crowd couldn't get that patch to reward all our hours of unranked Xbox Live time because we're shallow enough to enjoy playing with friends we know more than total strangers who trash talk way more often than not in the ranked rooms so we don't deserve anything to show for it? Oblivion got that extra achievement patch! Mass Effect got their extra achievement! Army of Two got some too! Heck, even Stranglehold got some new multiplayer achievements added later!

Bottom Line: The list looks as varied and interesting as we'd all figured it would be! I give Cliffy & company credit for knowing how to design achievements. But what have they FIXED?? Sure, a lot of attention's been rightfully given to this game for breaking new ground, but what about cutting the grass on the old ground? What about all the control glitches involved with, for example, turning tight corners and getting killed from a shotgun blast to the head at a suspicious & laggy angle? Having said all that, why patch today what you can charge sixty bucks for AGAIN two years later, right?

Smart business at its best.

...But that's just me.

HERE's the full achievement list, if you're interested...

Happy belated Labor Day everyone... More later.
-D.

Entry 84: "Olympic-of-the-Litter"

Yo!

Just wanna let everyone know "The Rant" episode FOUR is online now...

Let's see, what else is happening lately-- Hey, I have a complaint about something. Cable news organizations need to choose their words more carefully. I was breezing through channels last week, and I saw this terrifyingly worded bottom-of-the-screen news banner on CNN (this is the only clip I could find with that banner):



Of course, before I had enough time to dust off my Red Dawn DVD for survival tips on what to do if Russia invaded America's Georgia, my very improperly informed thoughts were dashed aside immediately by the realization that Russia had invaded Georgia, the COUNTRY. Not Georgia, the STATE. The point is, I really hope I wasn't the only American person who had no idea there was a country called Georgia before last week......

Oh, the 2008 Olympic Games in Beijing are almost over! Also breaking news, cows fart methane gas, helping cause global warming!!!!

Seriously, Virginia (well, the people I've talked to) doesn't really seem to care a whole lot about the Olympics lately. At least not since 1996, when attending the opening ceremony was just a quick layover in Nashville away from really being there. I wonder why that is. People still genuinely care about this event; I'm reminded every time I call any one of my old friends back in California. But why don't we care as much in the Old Dominion state?

.......Is it something in the water?

Sure, there are a lot of exciting things happening over there these days; Michael Phelps became the God of Swimming...

Janos Baranya of Hungary pulled a Joe Theisman in weightlifting-- But in the arm, not leg (WARNING: it's equally disturbing)...

The U.S. Men's basketball team wipes Germany off the bottom of their shoes...

...and most importantly, the Brazilian Women's Beach Volleyball team looking at Misty May-Treanor & Kerri Walsh with oh-so-subtle jealous rage you can just barely make out in the HD clips, right before losing again to Misty & Kerri today... And did I mention the fact that this one is Women's Beach Volleyball?

...Just saying.

Look people, It's in America's nature to treat watching the Summer Olympics as water-cooler fodder to keep track of while we wait for the presidential election coverage to heat up as we get closer to November. But we're missing the big picture here! Finding resolutions for the laundry list of controversies surrounding these games! My BestFriendForever Wikipedia ran down the list as:

-Allegations that China violated its pledge to allow open media access
-Various alleged human rights violations
-Air pollution in both the city of Beijing and in neighbouring areas
-Proposed boycotts
-Warnings of the possibility that the Beijing Olympics could be targeted by terrorist groups
-A foiled sabotage attempt
-Potentially violent disruption from pro-Tibetan protesters
-Banning of ethnic Tibetans from working in Beijing for the duration of the games
-Criticisms of policies mandating the electronic surveillance of internationally owned hotels
-Displacement of residents & ticket adversities
-Manhandling of foreign journalists
-Alleged harassment, house arrests, forced disappearances, imprisonment, and torture of dissidents and protest applicants.

...and the list goes on... It's almost to the point there are as many different controversies surrounding China's Olympics as America's current Administration! Which is saying a lot!

Bottom Line: Here's a crazy idea! Aren't the Olympics generally supposed to represent the meeting and healthy competition of cultures? Think about how much better things would be if wars were fought in the form of international sports competitions that only even happen twice a decade, instead of what we're seeing right now in Georgia (I know, the COUNTRY; I get it!!!!)? We should be using these games to their full potential, by seeing who's, for example, the best shooter of arrows, not bullets, and try to settle international disputes that way. No loss of life, no bloodshed, no heartwrenching 3am-on-USA-Network paid advertisements to send only thirty cents a day to help young victims, stuck in these war-torn environments the world over.

I'm sure that would bring the movie Rollerball to real-life essentially (Um... hopefully the 1975 James Caan version, NOT the 2002 Chris Klein version), but you can't argue against that in favor of the alternative, as Ron Paul prophetically predicted back in 2002:



...But that's just me.

I expect to see/hear about far less bloodshed around the world as we get closer to the 2012 Summer Olympics in London! ...Or better yet, 2010's Winter Olympics in Canada... Eh?

By the way, don't forget the closing ceremony is this coming Sunday night, 8/24!

Later!
-D.

Entry 83: "Tectonic Boom"

Yo!

"Plate tectonics (from Greek τέκτων, tektōn "builder" or "mason") is a theory of geology that has been developed to explain the observed evidence for large scale motions of the Earth's lithosphere. The theory encompassed and superseded the older theory of continental drift from the first half of the 20th century and the concept of seafloor spreading developed during the 1960s.

"The outermost part of the Earth's interior is made up of two layers: above is the lithosphere, comprising the crust and the rigid uppermost part of the mantle. Below the lithosphere lies the asthenosphere. Although solid, the asthenosphere has relatively low viscosity and shear strength and can flow like a liquid on geological time scales. The deeper mantle below the asthenosphere is more rigid again. This is, however, not because of cooler temperatures but due to high pressure.

"The lithosphere is broken up into what are called tectonic plates —in the case of Earth, there are seven major and many minor plates. The lithospheric plates ride on the asthenosphere. These plates move in relation to one another at one of three types of plate boundaries: convergent or collision boundaries, divergent or spreading boundaries, and transform boundaries. Earthquakes, volcanic activity, mountain-building, and oceanic trench formation occur along plate boundaries. The lateral movement of the plates is typically at speeds of 50—100 millimeters-per-annus (Latin for 'year')."

This is how Wikipedia clarifies the science of earthquakes.

This is how Judge Judy Sheindlin reacts to it:



So okay, there was a pretty scary magnitude 5.8 or so earthquake that hit much of the west coast late Tuesday morning. Reports say it originated around Chino Hills, CA and was felt as far out as Las Vegas. But that clip of Judge Judy bailing did look sorta funny, in a "This would've looked hilarious if it was left in the final broadcast show"way, and of course not a "Holy crap, they must've been terrified; glad I wasn't there, but I would've done the same thing" way.

Look people, Bottom Line with this is, you ever notice how whenever these extreme weather cases pop up, they seem to play out more and more like The Day After Tomorrow in slow motion? This, the wildfires last year, Katrina, etcetera... I've said it before and I'll say it again. I can't begin to think of what'll possibly happen with these environmental disasters next, but I doubt it'll get better from here, sadly. I'm not sure how if at all, man's influence on global warming might have caused tectonic plates to shift, but I guess one bright side is it could've been worse. A LOT worse. Another bright side is there may be a new island forming off the nearest coast to Chino Hills as a result of the shift....

I think I read somewhere that earthquakes had something to do with helping create new land masses...

...But that's just me.

Later, I gotta do some research.

-D.

Entry 82: "Unrealistic Tournament"

Yo!

It appears that some laughably low-budget indie film called The Dark Knight (doesn't ring any bells with me either) stomped all over everything this past week. According to ComingSoon.net's box-office tally, here's a list of all the records beaten to a pulp (lest we forget interrogation room Joker, if you recall) so far. It seems Chris Nolan's grabbed up:

- Widest release (4,366 theaters)
- Biggest opening weekend ($158.4M)
- Biggest July opener ($158.4M)
- Biggest PG-13 rated opening ($158.4M)
- Biggest single day ($67.2M)
- Biggest opening day ($67.2M)
- Biggest Friday ($67.2M)
- Biggest Sunday ($43.6M)
- Fastest to $200M in five days ($203.8M)

.........You want fries with that?

If there was any doubt before, it's more than obvious now the Batman film franchise couldn't possibly be in better hands. At least since Mr. Burton's kinda tied up with other stuff lately anyway. Keep it up, fellas at Warner/Legendary/DC, Nolan Brothers, Mr. Bale (once you get that domestic assault stuff cleared up, that is), et al. We the viewers expect great things from you guys for part three (or seven, depending on how you count. ...Let's go with three). Just ask some of those theatergoers yourself-- Oh, wait! I already did! Episode three of The Rant is online now. Check that out for more...

Anyway...

Recently, another super-violent video game was rereleased for Xbox 360 by the title of Unreal Tournament 3. It's a textbook class-based shooter game that borrowed its single-player campaign structure from Shadowrun (i.e. it has no campaign; it's pure multiplayer against 4-8 enemy A.I. opponents with 3-7 A.I. teammates backing you up) and in the recent tradition of shooters done by Epic Games, it's got pretty darn good graphics, a regenerating health system visualized by how red your screen gets (Thank God! I'd hate to see Rainbow Six Vegas 2's "more damage = blacker screen = less chance you can see enough to fight back" again!) and super-tall walking death machines ripped straight out of a certain H.G. Wells book/Orson Welles radio show/Tom Cruise film. Original.

UT3, as it's called, is generally known less for the campaign, or even the built-in multiplayer, and more for the user-generated content. Players on the PC and PlayStation 3 versions can make their own maps, game mods ("I want a bigger hoverboard!!" "I want characters to talk backwards!!") and such by using special editing software and copying it into the right folder on their computer hard drive for PC, or save their "Frankenmaps" to a Memory Stick Duo to import over to their PS3s. Meanwhile, the version us Xbox360-ers got, eight months late I might add, is of course devoid of any customizing/uploading ability. Because Microsoft might find out about one of us using the game's upload-to-the-360-hard-drive ability to unlock using an external USB hard drive to store more game content we paid "money" for in Xbox Marketplace, since 20 gigabytes isn't what it was five years ago, and a whole terabyte (about 1,000 gigabytes, if you don't know) of storage is a whole terabyte too much for us.

So thanks to Microsoft's paranoia about allowing user-generated content, we're expected to shell out the same price the PS3 players pay for their "fancy-dancy" Blu-ray version, for 2/3 the game.

Oh, wait. We get Achievements out of it? and the PlayStation guys might be getting some trophies added to theirs soon also? Then our Achievements aren't very special anymore, are they?

Yeah, UT3 was a good MULTIPLAYER game, and a decent time-waster while we wait for Gears of War 2 to arrive, since this trailer that came from E3 last week did its job too well; we want to see more!

...But it's not the same without the custom content. I was listening to some podcasts from game review sites recently that came to the same Bottom Line: Either Microsoft stops blocking studios' ability to let users do their own thing if the game allows it on platforms besides 360, or developers really shouldn't bother making the port for 360. That game won't be reviewed very well, and people might bother to rent it (like I did...) for a couple quick Achievements, but the product won't be making nearly as much money as a scarce rental instead of a medium buy. Microsoft has to sit down, get their heads out of planning this new (ridiculous, but if we have to...) interface and figure out their own hardware. Security of platform, or freedom of developers. I guess even Bill Gates' company can't have it both ways.

...But that's just me.

Later.

-D.

Entry 81: "Invasion of the Podcast People"

Yo!

Hopefully you all had a safe & fun 4th of July weekend... Such a shame all good things must come to an end, huh?

This post isn't the usual string of random observations as much as it is an announcement.

The YouTube channel I announced recently, "The Rant"... effective tonight, is now a full-blown video podcast!

For those who still don't know yet, the video series isn't more of my personal opinions, just complained into a camera instead of typed. The Rant is about interviewing random people from different walks of life, and giving them a chance to talk about life from their perspectives for a couple minutes. As I said in a recent post, new shows will be published all summer, through the end of September, when another special announcement will occur....

So anyway, get your iPods and PSPs ready, 'cause here's the feed:

http://feeds.feedburner.com/therantonline

iTunes users can go here:

itpc://feeds.feedburner.com/therantonline

Episode #102's Deleted Scenes show will be premiering on the podcast first later this week, before the YouTube site gets it, so you might wanna add that subscription soon.

That's actually it for now, see you next week, with Rant episode #103 and another post...

-D.

Entry 80: "Canon Fodder"

Yo!

Holy s---, p---, f---, c---, c---s----'n m----f---'n t---, George Carlin died Sunday! I really enjoyed his stand-up routines when and where I could catch them, but somehow I'll always remember him just a little bit more the way I first met him: As the vertically-challenged Shining Time Station conductor who'd introduce Thomas the Tank Engine shorts every day when I was younger. I'm starting to hate saying this about such awesome people once they're not with us, but I meant it last post and I mean it now. He will be missed.



Should've got around to posting this Monday or Tuesday. Topic's fresher.

This title was a loose fit by the way, but this opening transition paragraph made it work well enough.

I was listening to a video game news podcast earlier today and they were talking about how PlayStation 3's Metal Gear Solid 4 so perfectly ties up such a severely complicated and often confusing storyline spanning twenty years of games and fifty years of in overall-game-universe story, or canon. Which got me thinking about how rare consistency is in video games in general. Not in the sense of TOTAL surface consistency of the game itself (better known as a sequel), but in terms of play style consistency.

For example, if you know me on Xbox Live, you know I play LOTS of Gears of War. That game has you hit the right shoulder button to reload your weapon. Whereas, in Frontlines: Fuel of War, you reload with the LEFT shoulder button. Neither game has modifiable button mapping. So my question is, since it is 2008, computers and games are pretty advanced these days. Why can't all games control the same? Or at the very least all games let you customize how you want them to control? Sure, Xbox 360 lets you set basic stuff from the dashboard, such as which joystick controls character movement, Automatic or Manual transmission and Easy, Normal or Hard difficulty. But why can't games, in the generation of customization and community, let you use the Back/Select/2 button (X360, PS3 & Wii respectively) as the main weapon trigger if you wanted?

I'm sorry developers, but Legacy and Southpaw controller configurations were once impressive and a welcome option, but a lot's changed since 2001. Think about how much better we'd all be if we could just jump into a completely different driving game knowing we wouldn't have to remember different controller configurations anymore! No more waiting to get "in a groove," no more accidentally reflexively hitting B button in Call of Duty 4, expecting to Mêlée* attack someone because you just got done with Halo 3 (GOD I HATE WHEN THAT HAPPENS!).

Bottom Line: If we have to endure one more generation of consoles--- heck, another year of complicated learning curves and combination memorizing... Well, I won't be doing anything about it myself directly, but I'll be angrily trying to put up with whatever crazy controls Pandemic Studios will force on us when Mercenaries 2 comes out in August.

Oh by the way! The next film by Nickelodeon Movies, the guys behind Spiderwick Chronicles, is called Hotel for Dogs. The first trailer came out this week, and-- I have to show you guys this trailer, especially the ending. The amount of clever mechanical automation in the trailer alone almost puts the opening sequence of Back to the Future 1 to shame! ...Almost. I defy you to spot plutonium under ANYONE's bed in this movie!!!!



I know, I know, cheesy trailer for a family film #5,637,128. I just thought that ending vending machine bit was sorta funny.

Anyway, later!

-D.

*(correct spelling... I checked. Wikipedia. I was way off with the one acute accent.)

Entry 79: "When Legends Fall"

Yo!

As you all know by now, Meet the Press host Tim Russert passed away over Father's Day weekend. On Friday the 13th, of all days. I never watched a whole lot of MTP except for the split-second I'd catch while surfing through channels since MSNBC and CNBC are right between FX and Comedy Central. This reminds me of when Peter Jennings died, the internet news sites and message boards were in total disbelief and ABC was racing to do their own American Anchor-ish competition behind the scenes to see who would take over World News Tonight before settling for Charles Gibson, dawg. That last frame of MSNBC's MTP retrospective/memorial special Brokaw hosted Sunday night says it all. The set lights were dimmed down and Russert's empty chair was in center frame... Truly then we all knew that chair would never quite be filled the same way again. Mr. Tim Russert, you wil-- are missed.

As slightly less of you may know (since Russert obviously got all the mainstream media attention), special effects master Stan Winston also passed away this past weekend. The man who gave believability to Aliens, Predators and Terminators left us Sunday, leaving a legacy of unreality for us to share for generations to come. I read one message board post Monday claiming Winston faked his death somehow. Yes, I'm sure he's off playing shuffleboard with Steve Irwin, Tupac Shakur, Elvis Presley and all the other celebrities who "aren't really dead" until he decides to quit his self-imposed identity abandoning and get back to work. Mr. Winston's work made cinema fun, and CG almost unnecessary. In today's world, that's indispensable; knowing the actors are interacting with something extraordinary on-set, instead of noticing barely miscued glances and eye paths toward a CG character that's added in post-production. Mr. Stan Winston, you are missed.

Hmm. I've never eulogized two people at once before...

Also, if you don't believe the part about Steve Irwin faking his death, you clearly didn't see this grossly overlooked clip from the E! Network's The Soup a couple months ago:



Bottom Line: Understandably, a heck of a lot of people have taken these deaths pretty hard. Not to mention the fact that this couldn't possibly have been a worse time for these guys to move on up to that deluxe apartment in the sky. The November Obama vs. McCain election coverage begs to have some of that polygraph-ish talking point dissolving style of Russert's interviews and analysis. Winston was still doing work on McG's Terminator 4 movie but not until after Favreau's Iron Man suit was made EXTRA crimson-ey, which is something only Stan the Man could've done right. What if it was the other way around, and Winston passed during production of Iron Man, but after his legendary work on the Terminator franchise successfully lived on through the whole production? A man can dream...

...But that's just me.

God, Winston was gonna do Jurassic Park 4 too.....

BY THE WAY! Some of you readers may remember that top-secret television project I've been working on and hinting at all this time. Now you get to see a small sampling of what's in store. I'm personally hosting and producing an internet talk show on YouTube, MySpace & Facebook called The Rant, where I go around Virginia asking random people what's on their minds. New episodes will be released all summer through September, 1-2 shows a month, on top of the established 3-4 blog posts a month. Phew! So what are you doing for summer vacation?

Here's what to bookmark:

YouTube: http://youtube.com/therantonline
MySpace: http://www.myspace.com/therantonline (I know, it's not visually stunning; it's a work-in-progress.)
Facebook, you have to search for it right now, but I'm working on a decent standalone site just like the other two.

More soon.

-D.

Entry 78: "Don't Walk Into the Three Red Lights!"

Yo!

Well, it was a long time coming, but my beloved Xbox 360, after nearly eighteen months of faithful service, got slapped with a three-red-lights hardware failure last Wednesday night.

For the uninitiated, "three-red-lights" refers to the green "ring of light" surrounding the power on/off button on the front of all Xbox 360 consoles. In this case, the ring changes to three-quarters red...


...instead of a full circle of green...


...which signifies a critical. Hardware. FAILURE.

Having bought my 360 on eBay in December of 2006, I sorta knew it was a risky move, given the average "long shelf-life" of the item in question, not to mention the money involved. Luckily I had a good idea of the type of auction to watch out for, paid attention to the fine print, etcetera... You know, all the stuff your momma told you to do on your first day of auction school. However, I knew the rewards pretty much outweighed the risks, given 360's penchant for communication and overall community structure... Something PlayStation 3 doesn't deliver nearly as efficiently, and Wii... Well, it'd get too messy keeping track of all those "friend codes." As most of you readers know (since a lot of you most likely know me on Xbox Live and get my "new post" text message notifications every week), Xbox 360's community structure makes it really easy to publicize things like blogs or internet talk shows.

...Um... More on that later.

Oh, and media playability. Man, 360s can sure play WMV video files like they were made for 'em! Not many other formats, but Windows Media Video and MPEG4 (the video podcast file type) have never let me down!

Moving on, the Bottom Line here cannot be ignored: How are there hardware failures in this generation at all?? I remember the days when seeing a game glitch at all was an awesome sight! Mainly because back then it let you get away with doing things or moving around in areas in the game you're not meant to do/see. Especially the Game Boy Pokémon games. Back in the day, if you could pony up the $20 for a GameShark cheat device, the Poké-world was your oyster! These younger kids today have no idea what REAL game glitches are (*how old am I again?), since the new sense of the phrase is synonymous with BAD things! Oh, someone's glitching and messing up our ranked multiplayer game! Oh, that guy's hacking his way to a Pokémon character he's not supposed to have unless he could afford the bus fare/extra gas money to get to some special promotional event in person!

I'm telling!!!!!

First of all, it'd be just beating a dead horse to cap this post off with yet another "Microsoft-needs-to-let-us-customers-get- our-money's-worth-with-nonfailing-products!!" rant, so I'll just say this. These days, "you get what you pay for..." seems just more true now than ever. Which having said that, says volumes about how worthless $400 retail value really is in this case, huh?

...But that's just me.

See you next week. As for my X360 readers... Hopefully I'll see you in July, since the cardboard "coffin" I'm supposed to send Microsoft my 360 in... I dunno, the hearse blew a flat tire or something? It's taking too long to get here!!

-D.

Entry 77: "Call of Doodie"

Yo!

Okay, quick post this time. So I got most of the Call of Duty 2 achievements over with recently, and I'm reminded of how ridiculous the game's artificial lack-of-intelligence is, especially as far as headshot recognition, and your AI teammates running DIRECTLY into the line of fire, forcing the too-far-behind checkpoint to restart on account of "Friendly fire will not be tolerated"! I'm sure the A.I. can only anticipate human reactions and movements just so much, but this is the best these games can offer?

The "Mile High Club" mission at the end of Call of Duty 4 is a perfect example of how not to program AI because of this. You're in an airplane, and you have to basically fight your way from coach, up to the cockpit, killing "terrorists," to rescue some "VIP" character. The enemies here tend to pop out in groups around corners (of which there are plenty. Airplane, remember?) spraying machine gun fire and shotgun rounds forcing you to take heavy cover behind empty passenger seats, which doesn't work since here bullets pass through things, as they would in real life, but the frustration comes from having to take cover behind what are basically oversize sponges and do the classic "spray 'n pray" to get any kills. Oh, and you only have sixty seconds to finish the level. The AI problems come from lagging-behind teammates who should be spraying ACCURATELY, nearby, and know how to lay down cover fire. Despite its various general faults, CoD2 did get one thing definitely right: I can take cover behind solid objects and the AI teammates will lay down cover fire on their own and actually clear a path in the immediate area. Allowing you some time to heal up and deal with less enemies on your way out. CoD4 tries to do this, but it seems to me to be far less effective and noticeable this time out.

Also, is it just me, or is there a "Captain Price" character in every Call of Duty game? I now know there was one in CoD2, I know there's one in Modern Warfare (number 4)... I haven't tried CoD3 yet, but that would be interesting if there was, since that would mean the Price generational line would be the first McCain generational line of video games: Completely different eras (in the Call of Duty games, 1, 2 & 3 are World War II but different theaters/battles, 4 is meant to be modern battles in Afghanistan (sorry... "the Middle East"), Azerbaijan, Ukraine & Russia), each with completely different Prices. I don't recall what their first names are, or if they're even mentioned, but here again, big surprise. At least, not as much of a surprise as if, hypothetically, Infinity Ward made another Call of Duty game, based it in Vietnam, and a spinoff franchise is developed where that Cap. Price has long since retired, and decides to run for President. Oh wait. I mean Prime Minister (the Prices are always British).

The Bottom Line: It's 2008. Visual realism can only do so much to make up for LOGICAL realism. Period.

...But that's just me.

Oh by the way, it's been recently all-but-confirmed that Call of Duty 5 will be set (yet again) in World War II. YET AGAIN. Talk about taking a step backwards! I thought CoD4 proved you can make a modern warfare game that's... MODERN, and people will buy it! Why the need to rehash WWII yet again?? You can only kill the same Nazis so many times without fatiguing your consumers.

I leave you now with a semi-disturbing video of what happens when you microwave a cell phone (DON'T TRY THIS AT HOME):



Hope you had a great Memorial Day Weekend... See you next week.

-D.

Entry 76: "R.I.P., Kids' WB..."

Yo!

I had to wait until Saturday to post this, because I want to pay homage to something. I already have this coming Monday's post ready though, so don't worry.

During much of the '90s, Saturday morning television (at least as far as the non-cable/satellite, basic networks go) was dominated by a program lineup called Kids' WB. It began around the fall of 1995, and provided something unique and genuinely interesting to look forward to once the dreaded Monday-Friday school week was over. Kids' WB was the lineup that gave us Earthworm Jim, Road Rovers, Freakazoid!, Animaniacs (once FOX was done with 'em), Pinky & the Brain (NARF!), Bruce Timm's Superman series (without which Justice League would never have happened, I promise you) and Batman Gotham Knights (which despite the timing of that show's premiere in '97, wasn't meant to follow Batman & Robin in spirit... Thankfully, there were no rubber nipples on that show), LOONEY TUNES ON WEEKDAYS, Histeria!, Men in Black (the show that got me interested in pursuing television as a career.....), Jackie Chan's cartoon series, Static Shock, The Nightmare Room (R.L. Stine's OTHER book-to-TV series), X-Men: Evolution, The Batman and many others over the last thirteen years. Kids' WB also presented the first appearance of Cartoon Network's famed action block Toonami on a network you didn't need cable to see (God, I miss that summer), and gave much of America our first exposure to Pokemon.

The heyday could arguably be traced back to 1998-2001, during which pieces of the block would air for an hour before school (7-8am), two after (3-5pm), four on Saturday (8am-Noon), and even 9am to 1pm on Chicago-based cable outlet WGN! But first the morning hour ended... Then WGN re-airs went away (Cubs/Bears/Bulls games took priority, I guess). The real beginning of the end came around December of 2006, when the final episode of Transformers Energon aired on a Friday afternoon, marking the end of weekday lineups at all. They tried to make up for it by giving 7am-8am as an extra hour on Saturday, but it wasn't the same after losing Saturday encores, morning shows, Mon-Thurs classics and Friday re-airs of stuff from the past Saturday. I suppose the local affiliates petitioned together for getting that time back to air way more Judge Joe Brown in syndication or something.

Today was the first broadcast day of "The CW 4Kids," because "Kids' CW" was somehow already taken, I guess. Five hours on Saturday mornings, nothing more, nothing less. Maybe the network heads and affiliates think people can just go to Cartoon Network (the current home of Pokemon), Nickeloden or (*shudder) ...Disney... instead of the tried-and-true network slots so many of us '90-ers grew up with, just to get some decent weekday animation. Yeah, thanks. CW4Kids marks the death of what was left of truly original, not cheesy, cookie-cutter "action" or patronizingly juvenile comedy (which even KWB had sometimes too... Loonatics or Johnny Test, anyone?).

Bottom Line: Kids' WB will be remembered by many of us for exactly what it was: A haven for quality animation. It set the standard for how all other network blocks, broadcast and cable, will be judged, in terms of quality, consistency and variety. Period. Sure, Warner relaunched KWB this week as a video-on-demand website, now in "beta" form at the original web address, http://www.kidswb.com/, but nevertheless a void has now been left that CW4K simply cannot fill appropriately thanks in no small part to the inherited lineup timeslot restrictions from KWB's final months. It will be missed. I would now like a moment of silence in honor of this influential and historic program lineup.

September 9, 1995 - May 17, 2008.
Thanks for the memories.

Don't worry... The best is yet to come...........

Later.

-D.