Entry 3

Yo, peeps! Welcome to Blog Entry Numero Trés!

Well, I'll get straight to it: I was flipping through channels the other night, when I caught a glimpse of that VH1 week-in-retrospect series, "Best Week Ever." This week, they were doing some commentary on this study CNN aired a story on last week about the dangers of using sleep aids. This got me thinking about a plan to solve the war in Iraq. Now, before I start getting hate email from President Bush's remaining supporters, all eight of you, just hear me out.

Step 1: The Government would take about a few hundred-thousand milligrams or so of, let's say, Ambien, just to throw a brand name into the mix for illustrative purposes. Step 2: They would amass the fresh Ambien pills, and through a lengthy proccess, grind it all up into dissolvable powder. Step 3: Then, the Government will send over some jets to dump this substance into Iraq & Afghanistan's water supply from the air. Step 4: Later, after all the insurgents are very deeply sawing logs, since it's such a massive dosage, our troops would haul @$$ to get out of there, sneaking past them like the Grinch on Christmas Eve, and avoid any further attacks from any scattered insurgents they would encounter on the way out, saving the lives of our soldiers who would have died in those fights, and further financial losses from the national budget to finance what would no doubt be many more years of war.

Bammo! Mr. Bush, I give you a spanking-new exit strategy, "Operation: Weapon of Mass Doze-action." Let that marinate in your minds for a few minutes there, America. But that's just me. Oh, by the way, from now on, I'll try to make a real effort to be more consistent with this Blog. Expect more random thoughts from me on Mondays. At most, every other Monday, if the past week's been either too busy or too uneventful. A little something to help y'all cope with the first half of the new week. Stay strong, guys. The weekend's in sight. Well, I'm outta here! See y'all next week!

-D.

P.S. By the way, America: You're welcome.








*DISCLAIMER: This Blog entry, although humorous, is for entertainment purposes only and its author, Donn (hereafter referred to as "The Game-Master") does not, in any way condone the use of mass-drugging like this, at least on people who never did anything to deserve this kind of trick played against them in the first place. "The Game-Master" also acknowledges the fact that, realistically, should this hypothetical plan ever be played out in real-life, the mass-drugging in question would no doubt obviously affect the overall water supply of the whole area, thus affecting the innocent residents of the area who already, let's face it, have a difficult enough time as it is, without further health issues and complications caused by a dose of this magnitude of any FDA-approved drug that is used in this manner. Also, "The Game-Master" wholeheartedly apologizes if anyone else happened to come out online with this idea sooner than the time that this Blog entry was posted (7:40 pm EST Monday, March 27, 2006) or, let's say, Saturday Night Live or MADtv writers also happened upon this idea during the past week and decided to pull a similar stunt for a sketch of some kind. Seriously, good God, please, PLEASE don't sue me. I was only speaking hypothetically, ergo this entire disclaimer. I didn't watch either show this past weekend to find out if they did it already. Thank you.